Value Add Infinitum
Value Add Infinitum
A treatise on the phenomenon of Value-Add in B-schools and the classification of the B-schooler in this respect
Paper by: Abhishek Tripathi
Dated: Nov 6, 2005
“I joined a B-school for value addition to my career.”
“The course was ok but there was absolutely no value-add in it.”
“Oh, I am not enrolled in this course. I just attend for the learning value.”
Well well, what do you make of these? These are utterly common and weather-beaten phrases uttered in B-school campuses, at least in our country. And just before you start thinking it is simply a fashion statement, the in-thing, I’d like to warn you that you run the risk of offending serious B-schoolers who walk about their campuses with their Value-meters slung on their shoulders.
Although I am tempted to talk more about these creatures of precision and astute judgement, I will consciously refrain from it for the simple reason that I might, in the very near future, need to learn something from them. If you want to look for gold, don’t go to the goldmine; go to the sieve instead. Anyways, without doubt they are one of the most respected species on campus and even though any half-wit can gain easy publicity mileage out of making fun of them, he would really have to be a half-wit to be doing that. I guess this should suffice in my defense of ditching the cause of free & unbiased speech.
Ok, coming back to less pertinent matters. The phenomenon of value-addition is a very intriguing one with the actual occurrence remaining amazingly unpredictable and the mode of value-add assuming ever changing formats.
Diligent experts working in their hard-earned free-time have carried out a massive exercise of identifying and classifying the major species of B-schoolers, differentiated purely on the basis of their orientation towards Value and the act of it being added to their self. In the next few lines I will attempt to lay down the basic ground-rules that define these species. Going through these classification criteria is essential for a good understanding of the subsequent discussion presented in this paper.
Four major species based on a critical evaluation of their socio-psycho-academico-cocurriculo-extracurriculo-profile:-
Seekers, The Ardent
The Ardent Seekers are the pious souls lording over the pyramid of this classification. The species is characterized by an insatiable appetite for Value (in whichever form it comes to them), a conscious never-ending effort to seek and locate such value in every particle of this cosmos, a greedy assimilation of any crumb of value located and a constant feeling of having become a better person. They move around with their Value-meters slung on their shoulders and are notorious for inhabiting the cabins of professors, the dusty un-trodden aisles of libraries, the front rows of somniferous seminars and lectures and of course their rooms. Put succinctly, they are the ones who move crouched on all fours, leaving no stone unturned in their quest for Value, the only Holy Grail in their world.Stumblers, The RegressiveThe Regressive Stumblers are the happy humans who love everything in life and who have their place directly below the hallowed Seekers. These mirthful mortals are characterized by a happy-go-lucky attitude in life, an apparent lack of any effort at locating Value, a propensity to stumble into hidden Value occasionally, a remarkable habit of understanding the worth of that Value and a subsequent phase of assimilation. This invariably ends with a prolonged period of hibernation during which they are entirely incapable of stumbling upon any new Value and spend their time digesting the one just acquired. Compared to the Seekers, their assimilation systems obviously lack robustness and are limited in capacity. They can be found almost anywhere on the campus and the world is their drawing room. Put succinctly, they hop, skip and jump through life and whenever they stumble at a Value stone, they understand its worth, keep it as a souvenir and move on in life.
Stmblers, The Progressive
The Progressive Stumblers are the third in this well-formulated hierarchy and they are quite close in qualities to their immediate superiors, the Regressives. These carefree fellows are characterized by a similar happy-go-lucky attitude as of the Regressives, an inherent lack of any effort at locating Value, a propensity to stumble into hidden Value occasionally, a remarkable indifference and ignorance of the worth of any such Value and a temperament of moving on in life, come rain, hail or thunderstorm. A detailed analysis of their intellect has led to the conclusion that the apparatus for recognizing Value either does not exist in them or is malfunctioning in one way or another. Again, they can be found anywhere on the campus like their more gifted brethren, are known for their lethargic response to the elective selection mails from the administration and a supremely casual attitude while choosing courses. They are also famous for escaping unscathed from any elective, however brilliantly crafted to hammer Value into the subject’s minds. Put succinctly, the Progressive Stumblers are so named because of their enviable abaility to move on after stumbling into a Value stone and discarding it. They refuse to carry any load whatsoever and are useful for the Ultimate Planner in that they kick and turn most stones and yet take none.
Steps, The Wary
The Wary Steps are the last level of this classification and inhabit the very bottom of the pyramid (no reference meant to any management book). These clever beings are one of the rare species found in B-school campuses and the traits possessed by them are absolutely untraceable in any of the others. They are characterized by a complete and unflinching disbelief in the value of Value and are not given to arguing over the correctness of their approach to life. Interestingly, they are as great thinkers and predictors as are the Seekers, only that they use this divine ability to detect what they call sinister presence of Value and to diligently avoid any encounter with such Value deposits. They are known for their precision in tracking miniscule traces of Value, hidden in the most ingenious manner by professors and life alike. Members of this species can never be found at libraries and seminars, have to be dragged to the professor’s cabins by friends of other species, inhabit the last lofty rows in classrooms and are obviously fond of their rooms (can you spot the similarity with the Seekers). Generations of experts have debated over the hypothesis that these unique mortals are not a separate species by themselves but an even higher form of the Seekers. Put succinctly, they know exactly where the sinister Value stones lie in malicious ambush and they take great care to step around them. They are the most researched of the four species, a fact that should be apparent by the size of the paragraph you have just read about them.
Well. Now that I am done with this Herculean and unromantic task of laying down a brief classification of the B-schoolers, let me invite you to other jucier parts of my paper.
The phenomenon of Value-Add has basically two modes of operation (I won’t write modus-operandi; too full of value and might scare away the progressive stumblers and the wary steps): the first occurs when the subject is blissfully ignorant of any such possibility and is therefore entirely taken by surprise; the second occurs when the subject has entered the realms of possibility fully prepared and in some cases, solely for this purpose. It will prove helpful to note that the second case is a rare one and the enthusiastic and expecting subject usually ends up cursing his effort and himself. This mode is limited to the Ardent Seekers and other classes are by nature and definition, excluded from this.
The first mode invariably leaves a uniformly better impact on the subject, who emerges wide-eyed from the experience and launches on a mission of accosting anyone who has the misfortune of passing him by with the bubbling story of his genuine Value-Add experience. The total impact of this mode on the subject differs from person to person (criteria for distinction being their socio-psycho-academico-cocurriculo-extracurriculo-profile) with the Ardent Seekers lapsing into a near comatose state of recently achieved Nirvana (there have been confirmed cases of a halo sightings), the Regressive Stumblers bursting forth every now and then into uncontrollable smiles of ‘Oh what luck’ fascination, the Progressive Stumblers effort fully sporting a ‘bad-taste-in-my-mouth’ expression and cribbing dolefully about the injuries suffered and the Wary Steps exhibiting another form of intensely morose coma (spot a similarity with Seekers yet again?) born out of a feeling of being ambushed, molested and defiled out of their religion. However, all these profound states are essentially post-traumatic psychological disorders and are quite ephemeral in nature. This aberration in behaviour of the subject lasts for time spans ranging from 1 earth minute to 1 earth day. It will again be helpful to note that till date, in no case has the time exceeded 1 day, notwithstanding the intensity of the impact or the number of peer-corroborated halo sightings over the subject in question.
The second mode, as explained, is theoretically unavailable to the last three species and it is applicable only to the Ardent Seekers. Doughty researchers have risked their mental sanity to collect data on this mode and this specie’s behaviour regarding this mode (refer appendix A). Studies carried out in a premier B-schooler conservation reserve in Jharkhand reveal that the Seekers actually receive the major part of their Value diet through this mode only. They have been known to lie in wait for weeks and sometimes for months if they happen to smell an opportunity for Value-Add. The species exhibits heightened cerebral activity and electrical chaos in the frontal lobes of the brain (and that’s one big brain we are talking about) with abnormally high hormone levels (of only a certain kind) and sustained adrenalin rushes as the subject approaches the targeted time and location of a Value he has spotted.
Their have been cases of delusional hysteria when the subject becomes excessively paranoid about missing the said opportunity of Value-Add. A common indicator of a Seeker in, what experts call, Value-Heat is a harried expression on the face and continuing breathlessness. This might be accompanied by a rapid clenching-unclenching of the fist and shifty legs. Experiments have revealed abnormally raised levels of sensory perception, often bordering on the superhuman. Friends have reported distinct symptoms of relationship amnesia in such Seekers in heat.
Daring scientific excursions on the hideouts of some of the most notorious Seekers have revealed a wealth of information about the characteristics of this species. Searchers have found evidences of elaborate planning mechanisms in these hide-outs for tracking value and complex charts that aim to capture the relative interplay of Value in multiple value-sightings. Artifacts have been discovered that are written in undecipherable scripts and current expert opinion describes them as being the personal notes of collected value of a Seeker.
Another phenomenon of great Value (and what else) associated with the Seekers is the event of multiple-value sightings and the reaction of the Seeker to this situation.
Seekers have been known to get intensely analytical in the event of discovering a multiple-Value situation in the hope of filtering any bogus Value sightings. The remaining sightings are subjected to a rigorous test of value comparison in which the Seeker tries to locate the most valuable opportunity. More enterprising Seekers have been known to formulate intricate strategies to try and capture two or more Value-Add opportunities at the same time. Experts are of the view that further investigation into these strategies may lead scientists to the doorstep of time-travel and time-warping (Hermione who..?). In the event of missing any one of the multiple opportunities, a Seeker invariably gets inconsolably morose and has to spend days in bed mourning the grave loss of Value inflicted on his life. The period is marked by low appetite and abject reticence.
The other species have been found less mysterious in their characteristics and therefore this paper does not attempt to analyse them in detail. However, any possibility of future research into these species is not ruled out.
Conclusion:Being a Regressive Stumbler myself, what I have found is that life has so many teachings to offer at all stages of one’s life that it pays to be a Regressive Stumbler, to keep every valuable stone with oneself and to move in a care-free manner through the world as if it was one’s drawing room; to leave no experience untouched, no stone unturned. Mostly, one finds great value in listening to life and looking around oneself rather than in poring over books or in speaking too much too loudly. In this respect, my stay at XLRI Jamshedpur has been utterly effortless and fulfilling so far.
A treatise on the phenomenon of Value-Add in B-schools and the classification of the B-schooler in this respect
Paper by: Abhishek Tripathi
Dated: Nov 6, 2005
“I joined a B-school for value addition to my career.”
“The course was ok but there was absolutely no value-add in it.”
“Oh, I am not enrolled in this course. I just attend for the learning value.”
Well well, what do you make of these? These are utterly common and weather-beaten phrases uttered in B-school campuses, at least in our country. And just before you start thinking it is simply a fashion statement, the in-thing, I’d like to warn you that you run the risk of offending serious B-schoolers who walk about their campuses with their Value-meters slung on their shoulders.
Although I am tempted to talk more about these creatures of precision and astute judgement, I will consciously refrain from it for the simple reason that I might, in the very near future, need to learn something from them. If you want to look for gold, don’t go to the goldmine; go to the sieve instead. Anyways, without doubt they are one of the most respected species on campus and even though any half-wit can gain easy publicity mileage out of making fun of them, he would really have to be a half-wit to be doing that. I guess this should suffice in my defense of ditching the cause of free & unbiased speech.
Ok, coming back to less pertinent matters. The phenomenon of value-addition is a very intriguing one with the actual occurrence remaining amazingly unpredictable and the mode of value-add assuming ever changing formats.
Diligent experts working in their hard-earned free-time have carried out a massive exercise of identifying and classifying the major species of B-schoolers, differentiated purely on the basis of their orientation towards Value and the act of it being added to their self. In the next few lines I will attempt to lay down the basic ground-rules that define these species. Going through these classification criteria is essential for a good understanding of the subsequent discussion presented in this paper.
Four major species based on a critical evaluation of their socio-psycho-academico-cocurriculo-extracurriculo-profile:-
Seekers, The Ardent
The Ardent Seekers are the pious souls lording over the pyramid of this classification. The species is characterized by an insatiable appetite for Value (in whichever form it comes to them), a conscious never-ending effort to seek and locate such value in every particle of this cosmos, a greedy assimilation of any crumb of value located and a constant feeling of having become a better person. They move around with their Value-meters slung on their shoulders and are notorious for inhabiting the cabins of professors, the dusty un-trodden aisles of libraries, the front rows of somniferous seminars and lectures and of course their rooms. Put succinctly, they are the ones who move crouched on all fours, leaving no stone unturned in their quest for Value, the only Holy Grail in their world.Stumblers, The RegressiveThe Regressive Stumblers are the happy humans who love everything in life and who have their place directly below the hallowed Seekers. These mirthful mortals are characterized by a happy-go-lucky attitude in life, an apparent lack of any effort at locating Value, a propensity to stumble into hidden Value occasionally, a remarkable habit of understanding the worth of that Value and a subsequent phase of assimilation. This invariably ends with a prolonged period of hibernation during which they are entirely incapable of stumbling upon any new Value and spend their time digesting the one just acquired. Compared to the Seekers, their assimilation systems obviously lack robustness and are limited in capacity. They can be found almost anywhere on the campus and the world is their drawing room. Put succinctly, they hop, skip and jump through life and whenever they stumble at a Value stone, they understand its worth, keep it as a souvenir and move on in life.
Stmblers, The Progressive
The Progressive Stumblers are the third in this well-formulated hierarchy and they are quite close in qualities to their immediate superiors, the Regressives. These carefree fellows are characterized by a similar happy-go-lucky attitude as of the Regressives, an inherent lack of any effort at locating Value, a propensity to stumble into hidden Value occasionally, a remarkable indifference and ignorance of the worth of any such Value and a temperament of moving on in life, come rain, hail or thunderstorm. A detailed analysis of their intellect has led to the conclusion that the apparatus for recognizing Value either does not exist in them or is malfunctioning in one way or another. Again, they can be found anywhere on the campus like their more gifted brethren, are known for their lethargic response to the elective selection mails from the administration and a supremely casual attitude while choosing courses. They are also famous for escaping unscathed from any elective, however brilliantly crafted to hammer Value into the subject’s minds. Put succinctly, the Progressive Stumblers are so named because of their enviable abaility to move on after stumbling into a Value stone and discarding it. They refuse to carry any load whatsoever and are useful for the Ultimate Planner in that they kick and turn most stones and yet take none.
Steps, The Wary
The Wary Steps are the last level of this classification and inhabit the very bottom of the pyramid (no reference meant to any management book). These clever beings are one of the rare species found in B-school campuses and the traits possessed by them are absolutely untraceable in any of the others. They are characterized by a complete and unflinching disbelief in the value of Value and are not given to arguing over the correctness of their approach to life. Interestingly, they are as great thinkers and predictors as are the Seekers, only that they use this divine ability to detect what they call sinister presence of Value and to diligently avoid any encounter with such Value deposits. They are known for their precision in tracking miniscule traces of Value, hidden in the most ingenious manner by professors and life alike. Members of this species can never be found at libraries and seminars, have to be dragged to the professor’s cabins by friends of other species, inhabit the last lofty rows in classrooms and are obviously fond of their rooms (can you spot the similarity with the Seekers). Generations of experts have debated over the hypothesis that these unique mortals are not a separate species by themselves but an even higher form of the Seekers. Put succinctly, they know exactly where the sinister Value stones lie in malicious ambush and they take great care to step around them. They are the most researched of the four species, a fact that should be apparent by the size of the paragraph you have just read about them.
Well. Now that I am done with this Herculean and unromantic task of laying down a brief classification of the B-schoolers, let me invite you to other jucier parts of my paper.
The phenomenon of Value-Add has basically two modes of operation (I won’t write modus-operandi; too full of value and might scare away the progressive stumblers and the wary steps): the first occurs when the subject is blissfully ignorant of any such possibility and is therefore entirely taken by surprise; the second occurs when the subject has entered the realms of possibility fully prepared and in some cases, solely for this purpose. It will prove helpful to note that the second case is a rare one and the enthusiastic and expecting subject usually ends up cursing his effort and himself. This mode is limited to the Ardent Seekers and other classes are by nature and definition, excluded from this.
The first mode invariably leaves a uniformly better impact on the subject, who emerges wide-eyed from the experience and launches on a mission of accosting anyone who has the misfortune of passing him by with the bubbling story of his genuine Value-Add experience. The total impact of this mode on the subject differs from person to person (criteria for distinction being their socio-psycho-academico-cocurriculo-extracurriculo-profile) with the Ardent Seekers lapsing into a near comatose state of recently achieved Nirvana (there have been confirmed cases of a halo sightings), the Regressive Stumblers bursting forth every now and then into uncontrollable smiles of ‘Oh what luck’ fascination, the Progressive Stumblers effort fully sporting a ‘bad-taste-in-my-mouth’ expression and cribbing dolefully about the injuries suffered and the Wary Steps exhibiting another form of intensely morose coma (spot a similarity with Seekers yet again?) born out of a feeling of being ambushed, molested and defiled out of their religion. However, all these profound states are essentially post-traumatic psychological disorders and are quite ephemeral in nature. This aberration in behaviour of the subject lasts for time spans ranging from 1 earth minute to 1 earth day. It will again be helpful to note that till date, in no case has the time exceeded 1 day, notwithstanding the intensity of the impact or the number of peer-corroborated halo sightings over the subject in question.
The second mode, as explained, is theoretically unavailable to the last three species and it is applicable only to the Ardent Seekers. Doughty researchers have risked their mental sanity to collect data on this mode and this specie’s behaviour regarding this mode (refer appendix A). Studies carried out in a premier B-schooler conservation reserve in Jharkhand reveal that the Seekers actually receive the major part of their Value diet through this mode only. They have been known to lie in wait for weeks and sometimes for months if they happen to smell an opportunity for Value-Add. The species exhibits heightened cerebral activity and electrical chaos in the frontal lobes of the brain (and that’s one big brain we are talking about) with abnormally high hormone levels (of only a certain kind) and sustained adrenalin rushes as the subject approaches the targeted time and location of a Value he has spotted.
Their have been cases of delusional hysteria when the subject becomes excessively paranoid about missing the said opportunity of Value-Add. A common indicator of a Seeker in, what experts call, Value-Heat is a harried expression on the face and continuing breathlessness. This might be accompanied by a rapid clenching-unclenching of the fist and shifty legs. Experiments have revealed abnormally raised levels of sensory perception, often bordering on the superhuman. Friends have reported distinct symptoms of relationship amnesia in such Seekers in heat.
Daring scientific excursions on the hideouts of some of the most notorious Seekers have revealed a wealth of information about the characteristics of this species. Searchers have found evidences of elaborate planning mechanisms in these hide-outs for tracking value and complex charts that aim to capture the relative interplay of Value in multiple value-sightings. Artifacts have been discovered that are written in undecipherable scripts and current expert opinion describes them as being the personal notes of collected value of a Seeker.
Another phenomenon of great Value (and what else) associated with the Seekers is the event of multiple-value sightings and the reaction of the Seeker to this situation.
Seekers have been known to get intensely analytical in the event of discovering a multiple-Value situation in the hope of filtering any bogus Value sightings. The remaining sightings are subjected to a rigorous test of value comparison in which the Seeker tries to locate the most valuable opportunity. More enterprising Seekers have been known to formulate intricate strategies to try and capture two or more Value-Add opportunities at the same time. Experts are of the view that further investigation into these strategies may lead scientists to the doorstep of time-travel and time-warping (Hermione who..?). In the event of missing any one of the multiple opportunities, a Seeker invariably gets inconsolably morose and has to spend days in bed mourning the grave loss of Value inflicted on his life. The period is marked by low appetite and abject reticence.
The other species have been found less mysterious in their characteristics and therefore this paper does not attempt to analyse them in detail. However, any possibility of future research into these species is not ruled out.
Conclusion:Being a Regressive Stumbler myself, what I have found is that life has so many teachings to offer at all stages of one’s life that it pays to be a Regressive Stumbler, to keep every valuable stone with oneself and to move in a care-free manner through the world as if it was one’s drawing room; to leave no experience untouched, no stone unturned. Mostly, one finds great value in listening to life and looking around oneself rather than in poring over books or in speaking too much too loudly. In this respect, my stay at XLRI Jamshedpur has been utterly effortless and fulfilling so far.
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